Don’t bother looking kiddos, it’s just old Buster meandering into the New Year. Sorry, I’m a tad late in wishing y’all a Happy New Year! Perhaps you’ve heard the old saying that living with someone may cause one to assimilate the habits of the other person? Well, as you may also have heard, my teetering old pappy just happens to be a champion procrastinator!
So, in any event, old pap was catching a little news the other day, and he usually checks in on Fox as well (just to see what in the world is making some of his old friends and business associates so bloody crazy), and there they were: the two incoherent duffusses pretending to be “reporters” sitting on the “news” couch with the standard blond bombshell between them. The lady is wearing the obligatory ’70’s style short, short skirt, hiked up to a fair thee well, with her legs crossed for modesty. They, of course, are all lamenting the sad state of the world. Old pap and I can’t for the life of us believe those shapely gams are the only reason so many older males watch a bunch of Fox “News,” although we certainly can’t find another kernel of worth on this atrocity of the telly.
On this particular, otherwise pleasant, winter morning these cheerful purveyors of “fear porn” begin the show by “celebrating” the current chaos in the world’s stock markets, showing one of their “reporters” on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, who after announcing the latest bad news, breaks into nervous giggling. Then, they move quickly through the lone “terrorist” charging into a police station in Paris (on the anniversary of the Charlie Hebdo attack), the Saudi/Iran disputes, and North Korea’s purported Hydrogen Bomb. Finally, they conclude that all of these frightening situations are the fault of President Obama, who they postulate is only interested in taking your guns away and climate change.
Having sufficiently scared the devil out of their audience, they slip over to a young lady who promises to improve your email capabilities. She tutors, with a straight face, that words such as “sorry,” “just,” and “actually” should be avoided at all costs in writing your emails. Those words, she explains can make your messages sound weak and apologetic.
Following this astute advice, the show moves on to a pretty girl, who, after growing up in a small North Carolina town, became a famous Victoria’s Secret model. More interesting and important “news!”
This morning these relentless story seekers were all over the crazed fellow who shot a policeman sitting in his patrol car. He reportedly shouted, “I’m doing this for Allah” while firing his weapon which was allegedly stolen from another policeman. The salient question they took from this incident was, “What is the President going to say about this?”
Please, tell me it ain’t so, Buster.
PS: Recognizing that most of us are becoming accustomed to receiving our “news” by the “Twitter” type commentary now, old pap and I decided we will try to limit our communiqués to one subject.
PPS: Real soon, we’ll be attempting to ‘splain to ya why “Bernie” is the only reasonable solution to the 2016 Presidential slugfest.
Cheers, Bus and pap.