Good Morning, Buster. While I sure don’t want you jeopardizing your special dispensation, I’m real glad you are able to join me today. I remembered when we disagreed about “cutting the old fool some slack due to his “mental slippage,”and, of course, he’s gotten much worse since then. Years ago, you diagnosed him with EPPS (Excessive Potty Praise Syndrome), an illness not specifically recognized by the American Psychiatric Association, but,oddly enough, according to the Mayo Clinic, a primary cause of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is “excessive adoration” by parents of a child, so you were darned close.
Well, on Friday, the poor old guy held a “news conference” in the Rose Garden to announce that he was signing the bill to keep our old Gov operating, and that he was going to declare a “national emergency to build “the wall.” During the “news conference” and the following Q&A with reporters, our poor old “president” exhibited virtually every one of the twenty (20) symptoms of NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) listed by The Mayo on their website.
As you reported those many moons ago, the American Psychiatric Association maintains that they cannot diagnose him, due to their guidelines requiring an actual examination. Of course, no qualified physician can examine him since his White House doc claims he’s in perfect health. INCREDIBLE, BUT TRUE! So, notwithstanding the psychiatrists’ dereliction of duty, the man is obviously suffering from a terrible sickness.
So, I’m happy you have agreed to join me in apologizing to the poor old feller! We haven’t been kind in making light of his troubles, even once mentioning old Narcissus of Greek Mythology fatally fixating on his own reflection in a pool of water. Sickness is certainly not something to joke about, especially mental illness! However, his atrocious behavior, both in his business career and since assuming the highest office in our land, cannot be condoned or excused, and he needs to be restrained until he can be gotten into proper treatment.
Thus, we need to get those hapless Demoblicans to calm down their young, caroming saviors, and get organized. That will be harder than herding kitty cats. It is, though, absolutely necessary in order to bring some order to the crisis, not on our southern border, but in our federal government.
Remaining Positive: Happy Presidents Day, y’all.